Sisi declares himself Egypt’s God-send

Egyptian President Abd al-Fattah al-Sisi’s had an interesting talk with Germany Egyptian community during his recent four-day tour of Germany and Hungary, describing himself as a doctor sent from the heavens to solve the issues facing his country.

Sisi told his audience in the Q&A session, “God made me a doctor to diagnose the problem, he made me like this so I could see and understand the true state of affairs. It’s a blessing from God.”

Sisi added in his informal Cairene Arabic, “Leaders around the world, intelligence agency experts, politicians, journalists and the greatest philosophers, have begun to understand that what we're saying is pure, honorable, trustworthy, sincere and aiming only for the best interests.”

Sisi received much flack during his Euro-trip last week for bringing along a gang of celebrity starlets for support. German Chancellor Angela Merkel also criticized Egypt's use of the death penalty and poor religious freedom record.

Many users of a popular Egyptian Facebook group mocked Sisi’s bizarre statments, Mohammad Abd al-Galil joked, “You feel like he's a women’s hairdresser.”

Mahmoud Hellis Abu Rabie commented, “To the idiots that still believe in Sisi. If your Sisi was working for the sake of Egypt he would have taken academics and businessmen with him to Germany to get funding that would serve the country but insted he took along celebrities to put on a performance in front of the world that they support him as a figure. Sisi wants to prove his own personal legitimacy and is working soley for his own interests not yours or your country’s you idiots.”

Abdel Monei Zidane posted a photoshopped image of the president smoking a suspicious looking ciggarette with the caption, “Take another hit dude and forget about all of that.”